


Your Blue

by RawGlitter



Category: Elementary (TV)
Genre: AU, Alone in bedroom, Angst, F/M, OOC, Sad, Unrequited Love, short fic, that goddam ring
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-27
Updated: 2016-04-27
Packaged: 2018-06-04 20:09:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6673840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RawGlitter/pseuds/RawGlitter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Joan saw the ring in her hand.<br/>'It' beautiful'<br/>She said.</p><p> </p><p>It's middle of the night and Joan  is holding on. It's short fic about 4x22</p>
            </blockquote>





	Your Blue

**Author's Note:**

> This is not beta'd. And my first fic. Probably OOC.  
> Warning for sad Joan.  
> It's AU set they find about Moriarty the day after Joan learns about the ring.

The dim light of lamp at her bedside was making shapes of unrecognizable shadows on the ceiling. The room was in silence except for her slow breathing and police sirens passing outside. Lying on her bad for a sleep, she followed the edges of the shadows with her eyes.  
Slowly again and again.

She could hear Sherlock down stair bustling through rooms. It seemed he's going to reexamine the evidence whole night until he decided that he needs a rest and would probably collapse on the spot for few hours before dawn. Or maybe not sleep at all.  
Restless mind she presumed. Earlier that day he told her about his mother, his mother's ring and his father's intention for it. 

Such a vile man she thought, somehow finding every new horrible ways to hurt his own son, on purpose or not. When Sherlock talked about his mother's history, she saw his eyes filled with sorrow and pain.  
Deeply missing his long lost mother and hurting addiction hidden from him, not so surprising but nonetheless cruelty of his father. All things happening to him. No wonder he was restless. 

 

That was one of rare occasions him sharing piece of his mind with her. He has so few whom he does and she was glad she's in that tiny circle of people.  
So she did what she can do which is listening to him and hope it was enough at the moment.  
And she does not ask for more.  
That's why she barely stopped herself from reaching for him when he was talking.  
Comforting Sherlock through physical contact was what she has been cautiously avoiding thease days. 

Remember your boundaries, she has to keep remind herself. It was how they worked with each other, accepting what was offered and doesn't ask more than given.  
You can't force him to open up, you ask, wait until he's ready and listen, say something if needed.

It's balancing act of chastising him when he's out of line and listening when he is opening up to her and not asking more. They always walk on tightrope of boundaries, its important to balance their every next step. Especially when he is this fragile of state and he was in progress of overcoming his fear of relationship with Fiona. New rules and boundaries were set and must to be protected.

 

So when she saw the ring  
that striking blue reminded her his eyes and her heart sinked.

'it's beautiful'.

And just listened, whenever seeing him like this always made her want to reach but she couldn't.

 

'She would love it,Sherlock.'

 

She would say it when he needs her support. How near that future that would be she wasn't sure. But she would, for him.

 

 

She breathed deep. Slowly in and out, keep following the line of shadows. .

 

They were middle of investigating this dangerous case. They have to ground their position and stood strong, stay sharp. This was not the time for sentiment. She was able to acting fine during the day until she's finally be alone in her room.

 

Now deep drowned inside dark shadows her mind was as restless as his. Piercing blue was cutting into her heart . His glossy eyes, things he nor she wouldn't ask for and future that never be hers.  
And most of all she couldn't reach him when he is this hurt. 

 

Follow the line of shadow.  
Hold the aching in your chest.  
It happened before and It will pass as usual. It's just passing ache.

 

Just breath in, breath out. Follow the shadow. 

 

She would move on eventually. She has to.

 

Until than she can hold on as she always has.

She can hold on.

**Author's Note:**

> Again, this is AU that they have 12h or so term between finding out about Moriarty. This is OOC of Joan but how does she handle stress? After kidnapping? After Andrew died? She recently cried apparently but she would not cry for things not happened yet so I went for mild/short panicking alone. She does shut down after traumatic event, all the pent up stress bursts into little panicking alone I imagined. Thanx for reading this short sad fic.


End file.
